i saw the eye doctor today

Hahahahahahahahahaha...I'm so funny!

Seriously.  I visited with the eye doctor today.  He gave me three options:

1.  Steroid injection into the styes.  [Read: benign-sounding term for a shot--with a needle--into my lower eyelid--hello(?) right by my eye.]  I explained another eye doctor tried that last time I had one of these monsters and I ended up with a huge black eye and the little white bump that won't go away.  He acknowledged the little white bump is a scar from the steroid injection so it's likely that scars are my body's response to steroid injections.
2.  Lance those monsters.  Whaaa???  [Read: pull back my eyelid and, well, I can't even bring myself to type the words he used, it makes me feel a little sick to think about it, but realize that if number 1 is bad, number 2 is worse--way worse.]  He acknowledged this would be "pretty uncomfortable", which in non-doctor speak means he won't feel a thing but it's going to hurt like hell to me.
3.  Continue the steroid drops twice a day for a month and come back if the monsters are still there and we'll engage in further discussion about number 2.

He assured me these monsters "almost always" resolve given enough time.  I asked what he'd do if we were talking about his mom's eyelid and he paused, thought for a brief moment and said he'd go with number 3.  So we are.  I decided right then to avoid needles and other sharp cutty things around my eye from here on out.  I may have fallen for that needle thing once before, but not again.  No way.