emotions--pfft

This spring is mirroring my emotions.

Everything from sunny blue skies with puffy little clouds to dark overcast stormy.  Sometimes clear, sometimes sprinkles, sometimes downpours and sometimes even hail or snow.  But sometimes sunny.

Jr likes to tell people that emotions suck.  Or something like that.  Maybe who needs emotions.  Or maybe that isn't it either, but you get my drift.  The emotions, they are wearing me out.

15 things I have been feeling/thinking lately:

1.  I miss my friends.  Period.
2.  Why didn't I get a sister and why didn't my mom get a sister and why didn't Jessie get a sister?  This makes me sad.  Blue--deep, dark blue.
3.  These grandkids are adorable lifesavers.
4.  My oh my but the gardens this year are overwhelmingly, over and over, joyful.
5.  I am so tired of my job.
6.  I am so proud of my work.
7.  Can we just have peanut butter sandwiches for dinner?  Again?
8.  That lilac out back is glorious and its scent is heavenly.
9.  I'm so grateful I'm not allergic to lilacs.  Or anything.
10. I can't hardly wait to read the books I ordered online last weekend (HUGE thanks to Lisa for writing and dedicating one of her poems to Gabriel Garcia Marquez).
11. How did I get to this point in life without knowing about him?
12. How are there so many things I know nothing about, like, for example, electricity?  What is it?
13. Zumba forces--forces!--me to feel more upbeat, in my head and my body.
14. Isn't it time to go see the Californians?
15. Does that make me greedy?  Spoiled? 
16. How lucky am I to be able to go so often?  (Way lucky but see #5 above, since this constant need to see my girl and her family keeps me getting up and going to work so I can afford to go see them as often as possible--so sheesh quit whining you big baby for everyone's sake.)

Writing lists really clears my head when I have all of these feelings and thoughts and don't know what to do with them all.  It is good to remind myself that spring weather will settle into summer heat, the leaves and blossoms will arrive, and my boisterous feelings will calm soon. 

It's what happens.