The shootings in Arizona are still with me.
I keep running it through my head and this is the latest I have:
1. Gun laws--really do we need semi-automatic handguns in the hands of anybody? I know cops have them and bad guys have them, but really do we need them?
2. Freedom of Speech--vital right given to us all--but doesn't some level of responsibility come with it? Even if you eliminate this latest tragedy, hasn't there been an increasingly larger amount of negative, hateful, mean-spirited talk spewed in the world and a huge increase in the number of ways we are all assaulted--not just in politics but all over the TV and the radio and the internet and the facebook and on and on and on and example after example after example of people behaving badly while others nod and agree and smile and a few make money from the bad behavior?
3. He's a madman--really? That's the best we can do? Blame it on the crazy and walk away? I read several articles yesterday that pointed out that research shows that mental illness--bipolar disease and schizophrenia, the two mental illnesses that most commonly include hallucinations and delusions--is not typically associated with violent behavior. The level of violence increases only slightly in association with mental illness. Most violence is associated with alcohol or drug abuse. Yet the media will scream, "MENTAL ILLNESS--CRAZYMAN" leaving us feeling vulnerable and uncomfortable and afraid of those who are truly ill and deserve compassion.
4. I'm trying to not take one side over the other politically. I really am. But. I can't help but wonder how the side of the aisle that is so determined to pin this attack on crazy is also the same side that is so determined to cut social spending--the very social spending that provides the care needed for those who suffer from debilitating mental illness. Really?
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Sunday, January 9, 2011
i just don't get it
Every time I think about the congresswoman who was shot yesterday in front of a Tuscon Safeway, I feel physically sick.
I want to look away when I hear the debate on TV over whether the shooter was influenced by the hate and lack of civility in congress and the media or whether one side of the aisle is using the shooting in a political manner.
What is wrong with us? We are spinning out of control, down, down, down.
I want to look away when I hear the debate on TV over whether the shooter was influenced by the hate and lack of civility in congress and the media or whether one side of the aisle is using the shooting in a political manner.
What is wrong with us? We are spinning out of control, down, down, down.
i admit it
I'm exhausted. I need to get back to work to rest.
I attended my first class Friday morning at 7:00 am. Yes, it's 35 miles away.
I had hoped to be able to maybe attend only occasionally or perhaps even test out, but no, this class (in which I will learn over the next 16 weeks to write a really good resume and cover letter) requires attendance every week because half of the grade is based on attendance.
After class on Friday, since it was an off day, I headed one exit south to Jessie's for a quick visit with her and the girls accompanied by homemade oatmeal applesauce muffins and o.j. It was very nice.
Next, I headed home to finish cleaning out my closets and sorting through the clothes and coats, eventually filling up my car with clothes and coats that Jack and I dropped of at The Road Home. I thought about taking a picture of the embarrassingly large pile of empty hangers, but instead hauled them to the garage. Meant to take them to the trash, but got distracted, so if you need any hangers, I know where you could score a bunch.
It seems like there was a bunch of cleaning and laundering and such, but it escapes me right now.
Saturday morning, it was back to school at 8:00 a.m. for my Race & Ethnicity class followed at 10:45 by my Business Law class. I'm going to try to withhold judgment on the classes for now, but let's just say that after the first class I wanted to discipline several classmates for how totally clueless they seemed to be, but maybe that's why we get to take this class, right? The second class was a total exercise in biting my tongue, although it probably didn't seem that way to my classmates or teacher. For most of the two plus hours, I wanted to ask him to site his sources because it felt so questionably biased, like maybe I had entered the wrong room and was in conservative news 1010? I don't know, it was just discouraging. But I will persevere, I will continue to attend, I will raise my hand and my voice as often as, well, as often as I can, even if the three kids behind me continue to sigh and moan every time I speak.
Saturday afternoon was spent cleaning and making a yummy dessert for later after dinner with Colleen and Gary and then just dancing with them and Sugar and Fenton. We haven't had a fun night out with friends like that in I don't know how long.
Today began with breakfast with Stu and his family and the drummer and his girl and Jr and Jack. It is good to eat together. And then just dance together. And then nap before Jessie and her brood came up for dinner and more dancing.
Food and dancing and school. That's my life. Not so bad, really. Pretty great, really.
I attended my first class Friday morning at 7:00 am. Yes, it's 35 miles away.
I had hoped to be able to maybe attend only occasionally or perhaps even test out, but no, this class (in which I will learn over the next 16 weeks to write a really good resume and cover letter) requires attendance every week because half of the grade is based on attendance.
After class on Friday, since it was an off day, I headed one exit south to Jessie's for a quick visit with her and the girls accompanied by homemade oatmeal applesauce muffins and o.j. It was very nice.
Next, I headed home to finish cleaning out my closets and sorting through the clothes and coats, eventually filling up my car with clothes and coats that Jack and I dropped of at The Road Home. I thought about taking a picture of the embarrassingly large pile of empty hangers, but instead hauled them to the garage. Meant to take them to the trash, but got distracted, so if you need any hangers, I know where you could score a bunch.
It seems like there was a bunch of cleaning and laundering and such, but it escapes me right now.
Saturday morning, it was back to school at 8:00 a.m. for my Race & Ethnicity class followed at 10:45 by my Business Law class. I'm going to try to withhold judgment on the classes for now, but let's just say that after the first class I wanted to discipline several classmates for how totally clueless they seemed to be, but maybe that's why we get to take this class, right? The second class was a total exercise in biting my tongue, although it probably didn't seem that way to my classmates or teacher. For most of the two plus hours, I wanted to ask him to site his sources because it felt so questionably biased, like maybe I had entered the wrong room and was in conservative news 1010? I don't know, it was just discouraging. But I will persevere, I will continue to attend, I will raise my hand and my voice as often as, well, as often as I can, even if the three kids behind me continue to sigh and moan every time I speak.
Saturday afternoon was spent cleaning and making a yummy dessert for later after dinner with Colleen and Gary and then just dancing with them and Sugar and Fenton. We haven't had a fun night out with friends like that in I don't know how long.
Today began with breakfast with Stu and his family and the drummer and his girl and Jr and Jack. It is good to eat together. And then just dance together. And then nap before Jessie and her brood came up for dinner and more dancing.
Food and dancing and school. That's my life. Not so bad, really. Pretty great, really.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
did i mention
1. I completed my associate's degree in economics.
2. I cleaned out the storage room downstairs.
3. I begin my senior year in college on Friday morning at UVU. That's 7:00 a.m. Friday morning. I may need to sleep over with some of the girlies every Thursday night for the next 16 weeks.
4. I moved the girlies' toys from the hallway closet into the toy bedroom closet and sorted through the heaps of clothing I'd packed into the bedroom closet so I could donate most if not all of the pile.
Okay, I haven't sorted through the clothes yet, but I am very close to sorting. And donating. So if anybody wants anything from that closet to recycle into something cute for a young girl, they'd better hustle on over here before Sunday.
I'm just saying.
Oh and I was just kidding about the sleepovers. Unless I'm invited...
2. I cleaned out the storage room downstairs.
3. I begin my senior year in college on Friday morning at UVU. That's 7:00 a.m. Friday morning. I may need to sleep over with some of the girlies every Thursday night for the next 16 weeks.
4. I moved the girlies' toys from the hallway closet into the toy bedroom closet and sorted through the heaps of clothing I'd packed into the bedroom closet so I could donate most if not all of the pile.
Okay, I haven't sorted through the clothes yet, but I am very close to sorting. And donating. So if anybody wants anything from that closet to recycle into something cute for a young girl, they'd better hustle on over here before Sunday.
I'm just saying.
Oh and I was just kidding about the sleepovers. Unless I'm invited...
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
am i alone here?
Am I the only one who is feeling discouraged by the following items in the news today:
1. New session of congress about to begin. Lots of assurances that all changes of the past two years will be canceled and replaced by certainly better changes.
2. The commander of a Navy ship made videos that should have been used during how-not-to-behave training but were instead considered entertainment.
3. Yet another black man who spent 30 years in prison for a crime he didn't commit was freed and his conviction overturned thanks to DNA evidence.
4. Thousands of black birds were found dead in Arkansas and Louisiana.
1. New session of congress about to begin. Lots of assurances that all changes of the past two years will be canceled and replaced by certainly better changes.
2. The commander of a Navy ship made videos that should have been used during how-not-to-behave training but were instead considered entertainment.
3. Yet another black man who spent 30 years in prison for a crime he didn't commit was freed and his conviction overturned thanks to DNA evidence.
4. Thousands of black birds were found dead in Arkansas and Louisiana.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
me and cats
My love for cats goes way back.
The first cat I fell for was a stray kitten that followed me home from first grade. Or perhaps I saw it on my way home from school and noticed it walking behind me for a few steps because that's what kittens do, and then I picked it up and carried it the rest of the way home with me.
I don't remember having a plan about how I would take care of it and I didn't think of it as stealing someone else's kitten--I just thought it was adorable and I wanted it, so I kept it. After all, I was only six and it was cold outside and obviously it wanted to be with me, right?
Somehow, I got the kitten past my mom's ever watchful eye and into my bedroom. Even at that tender age, I had figured out that there was a high likelihood that she would say no, go put it back where you found it (remember, the day-after-Halloween trick-or-treating with my younger brother had already happened and I sure didn't want to go through that nightmare again and have to apologize for taking something that seemed so reasonable for me to have), so I closed my bedroom door and played quietly with the kitten for the rest of the day. Looking back, it is amazing that I got away with that part--the closed door part--because my mom was a huge fan of leaving the bedroom doors open--well, except for when she wanted the doors closed and kids in their rooms being quiet, so she'd close the door and hook the latch she'd installed at the top of the door. At some point in my life, I realized that not everybody's mom locked them into their rooms, but at the time she did it, it just seemed like one more way that she was clearly in charge, she was big and I was little, get used to it.
Anyway. The kitten. We played all afternoon together and I fell madly in love with this sweet little fluffy baby. When my mom called us to dinner, I panicked just a bit, but then realized I could just close my bedroom door and the kitty would be there, safe and sound, when I returned.
I had never finished my dinner so quickly. Because I was so young, I wasn't allowed to help with the dishes, so as soon as possible, I slipped away from my chair and headed back to my room.
That is when I realized I had adopted a magical kitten. It had disappeared. I was totally baffled. I knew I'd shut the door tight and nobody had been in my room, but the kitten was no where to be found. I was heartbroken and convinced that not only had my mom found the kitten and disposed of it, but she was being extra cruel by not even admitting it to me.
I began quietly weeping. And that's when I heard the little mew. Startled, I looked around, certain that my brothers must be in on the joke and were playing an even more cruel prank. But they were nowhere in sight. I listened intently and heard another mew. I began calling, kitty? kitty? and before long, I located the kitty. It had scaled my closet shelves and was up on the top shelf, high out of my reach.
It was about this time when my mom poked her head into my room and found my tear-stained cheeks. She followed my gaze to the top of my closet at about the same time that the kitten mewed again. I believe her response was a combination of: "What is that doing in your closet?" and "Oh my, what a cute little kitty." My explanation tumbled out--it followed me home, it's so cute, I love it, can't we keep it, as my mom coaxed the little fluffball off of the shelf and into her arms.
I had never before seen my mother behave so tenderly. You see, she has a soft spot for kittens too.
She was amazed that I'd been able to keep it from her for so long and explained that we could keep it but it would have to live outside. We got it a bowl of milk, which it eagerly lapped up. At some point, my mom found some yarn and showed me how kittens like to chase things, and after all of the feeding and holding and playing, I heard the kitten's rough purr for the first time. I was smitten with kitty love.
I remember feeling very sad about not getting to sleep with the kitty that night, but my parents assured me it would be fine outside and I could play with it when I awoke in the morning.
I'd like to say that I had that cat for many years, that we spent lots of Purina kitty chow moments. Unfortunately, the kitten had an accident that involved my dad's truck. My parents were devastated when they told me about it. Within a very short time, my mom found a new kitten, Mimi, a Siamese, who lived for several years and was followed by Sammy, another Siamese, who lived until I was 19.
Yesterday, I decided to clean out the storage room in our basement where the cats have been living since Gus joined our family. Let's just tell the story in pictures:
The first cat I fell for was a stray kitten that followed me home from first grade. Or perhaps I saw it on my way home from school and noticed it walking behind me for a few steps because that's what kittens do, and then I picked it up and carried it the rest of the way home with me.
I don't remember having a plan about how I would take care of it and I didn't think of it as stealing someone else's kitten--I just thought it was adorable and I wanted it, so I kept it. After all, I was only six and it was cold outside and obviously it wanted to be with me, right?
Somehow, I got the kitten past my mom's ever watchful eye and into my bedroom. Even at that tender age, I had figured out that there was a high likelihood that she would say no, go put it back where you found it (remember, the day-after-Halloween trick-or-treating with my younger brother had already happened and I sure didn't want to go through that nightmare again and have to apologize for taking something that seemed so reasonable for me to have), so I closed my bedroom door and played quietly with the kitten for the rest of the day. Looking back, it is amazing that I got away with that part--the closed door part--because my mom was a huge fan of leaving the bedroom doors open--well, except for when she wanted the doors closed and kids in their rooms being quiet, so she'd close the door and hook the latch she'd installed at the top of the door. At some point in my life, I realized that not everybody's mom locked them into their rooms, but at the time she did it, it just seemed like one more way that she was clearly in charge, she was big and I was little, get used to it.
Anyway. The kitten. We played all afternoon together and I fell madly in love with this sweet little fluffy baby. When my mom called us to dinner, I panicked just a bit, but then realized I could just close my bedroom door and the kitty would be there, safe and sound, when I returned.
I had never finished my dinner so quickly. Because I was so young, I wasn't allowed to help with the dishes, so as soon as possible, I slipped away from my chair and headed back to my room.
That is when I realized I had adopted a magical kitten. It had disappeared. I was totally baffled. I knew I'd shut the door tight and nobody had been in my room, but the kitten was no where to be found. I was heartbroken and convinced that not only had my mom found the kitten and disposed of it, but she was being extra cruel by not even admitting it to me.
I began quietly weeping. And that's when I heard the little mew. Startled, I looked around, certain that my brothers must be in on the joke and were playing an even more cruel prank. But they were nowhere in sight. I listened intently and heard another mew. I began calling, kitty? kitty? and before long, I located the kitty. It had scaled my closet shelves and was up on the top shelf, high out of my reach.
It was about this time when my mom poked her head into my room and found my tear-stained cheeks. She followed my gaze to the top of my closet at about the same time that the kitten mewed again. I believe her response was a combination of: "What is that doing in your closet?" and "Oh my, what a cute little kitty." My explanation tumbled out--it followed me home, it's so cute, I love it, can't we keep it, as my mom coaxed the little fluffball off of the shelf and into her arms.
I had never before seen my mother behave so tenderly. You see, she has a soft spot for kittens too.
She was amazed that I'd been able to keep it from her for so long and explained that we could keep it but it would have to live outside. We got it a bowl of milk, which it eagerly lapped up. At some point, my mom found some yarn and showed me how kittens like to chase things, and after all of the feeding and holding and playing, I heard the kitten's rough purr for the first time. I was smitten with kitty love.
I remember feeling very sad about not getting to sleep with the kitty that night, but my parents assured me it would be fine outside and I could play with it when I awoke in the morning.
I'd like to say that I had that cat for many years, that we spent lots of Purina kitty chow moments. Unfortunately, the kitten had an accident that involved my dad's truck. My parents were devastated when they told me about it. Within a very short time, my mom found a new kitten, Mimi, a Siamese, who lived for several years and was followed by Sammy, another Siamese, who lived until I was 19.
Yesterday, I decided to clean out the storage room in our basement where the cats have been living since Gus joined our family. Let's just tell the story in pictures:
My injuries were not life threatening. As much as I like Gus, sometimes, I wish he would just shut up about how much he wants to play with the kitties and maybe even just let them sleep on my bed with me occasionally. That would probably help out the 3:00 am wakings. There's nothing like sleeping with a cat curled up next to your back or legs to help you feel safe and warm. I learned that back in first grade.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
the ballet 2010
Jr and the girls and their moms and I went to the ballet for yesterday afternoon's matinee performance of the Nutty Nutcracker.
This year's Nutty performance included cameos by Marilyn Monroe, Elvis, Dolly Parton, Willie Nelson, Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, Dracula, the Hunchback, Dorothy, Gene Kelly, Lady Gaga, Madonna, Cher, Beyonce, Brittney Spears, Frankenstein's monster, the Bride of Frankenstein, Darth Vader, Han Solo, Jackie Chan, James Bond, Kevin Eubanks, Jeanie and Major Nelson, and many others I can't remember right now.
The Nutty ballet would probably be more entertaining and less confusing to the girlies if Elmo and Dora and the Disney princesses were performing, but we all seemed to enjoy it just the same. My favorite moments were:
1. Audrey's delight by the Gene Kelly "Singin' in the Rain" segment. She's only three.
2. Breanne and Audrey's discussion, accompanied by much "shushing" from Jr, regarding whether the dancing girl was named "Jeanie" or "Jasmine" and whether she was a genie or a princess. Breanne wasn't budging: Her name was Jasmine and she's a princess.
photos from Shi's facebook page
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