rethinking it

My how things can change in a day or two.

Let's just blame that last post on percocet.

True, manipulation was not pleasant.

But now I can once again move my right arm in almost as many directions as my left arm.

It is still tight, but not painful.

And the reality is that when I woke up on Saturday after taking only one pill on Friday, the pain and discomfort I was feeling was not in my arm at all--it was all over my body, everywhere except for my shoulder. That got my attention. I also had a runny nose. That's when I started to wonder if I was getting a cold.

So rather than swallowing down more percocet, I took advil. And drank water. And a mango pineapple smoothie from McDonald's. After a while, I took more advil. And more water. And a grilled cheese sandwich.

And then we went to the Provo house to work on a couple of last things that still need a bit more work before we'll be done there, but we have two sets of tenants now.

And while working at the Provo house, I sweated and moved. And I thought I might just die in that 100 degree heat.

But that's when I started to feel better. After I finally got all of the serious drugs out of my body.

I have real compassion for people who get hooked on opiates. You start out taking the prescribed amount and it helps you feel better. But after a while, you have so much in your body that you don't feel so great. Then you take more. And you feel worse. And before you know it, you are foggy in the brain and can't figure out what is happening. And you get emotional. And you decide you need to stop taking the drug because you don't want to eat or drink. So you cut back, but then you feel worse. So you're at a point where you have to make a decision--take more or stop taking it. And it's supposed to make you feel better, so shouldn't you take it? And when you don't take it, you feel worse. You get achy all over and you're nauseated and then your nose starts running.

But if you don't take it then, you're lucky that you made that decision. Because you'll feel better the next day. At least that's how it worked for me.