Tuesday, June 7, 2011

horn power

For the first few days after the guy on the motorcycle ran into me, I had a hard--HARD--time driving, which made for a complicated life since I spend approximately 50% of my day in my car. Okay, that may be an exaggeration. Probably only 20%. But still, it was difficult.

Everywhere I went, it seemed other drivers were drifting into my lane. Or perhaps my sensory abilities were on high alert--HIGH ALERT--or perhaps a combination of those things. But still. Driving was making me crazy. Or I was making myself crazy whilst driving.


I knew I needed to get over this seemingly unreasonable fear since it was causing me to swerve to avoid the drifters, which is perhaps the reason why I ended up facing the wrong way after getting hit by the motorcycle. The swerving that is. Well, the swerving and the motorcycle slamming the side of my car.


During that first day or two post-gomhme (guy on motorcycle hitting me), while swerving to miss all of the drifters, I realized that I NEVER use my horn. I thought about that and got this idea that maybe if I used my horn, I could have warned the gomhme so he could have stayed in his lane and not hit my car. If I thought about it too much I could convince myself that honking might have startled him into swerving under my car, but I tried really hard to not go there.

I puzzled all of this over, and then one day, developed a new way to hold onto my steering wheel so my hands are close to my lap with both thumbs on the horn, just in case I need to warn someone off, right? I've been driving with my hands in that position for days now. One day I even practiced honking the horn while driving out in the middle of nowhere on the way up north. BEEP! BEEPBEEP!!!! BEEP!

Surprisingly, or maybe not so much, I've felt much safer and more prepared.

And then guess what? Today while driving from school to work, another driver started drifting into my lane, and before I even realized what I was doing, I honked!

Just a little BEEP!


I broke out into a little bit of a sweat and got a bit trembly. But it was all automatic and after I settled down, I FELT SO POWERFUL!

Driving and horn and me are tight now.

1 comment:

Joey said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your accident. Did you know I hit a motorcyclist once? It's a horrifying experience.

I have no fear of honking. But I think I know why you did.

Glad to see that you are in control now. Horns...great, great safety device. Not just for making other drivers mad. Although, it works for that, too!