I feel better. As in, perhaps, better than I ever remember.
And these are the ways I can tell.
1. No more of the suicidal plans or thoughts. I can go about my day just thinking, and not have one single "you could jump off of that building" or "you could drive off of that road" "wonder if you really get electrocuted if the hair dryer falls into the sink of water" thought drift through my mind. And no more "hmmm, that seems like a crazy plan, but it just might work" nonstop-thinking plan.
2. I am now free to express my feelings and thoughts to those around me without feeling selfish or bad about thinking about myself first.
3. I have energy. Not the crazy, can't stop moving, stay awake at night to finish my chores, kind of energy. But enough energy to enjoy brushing my dogs, playing with the girls, watching a movie, cleaning up my gardens, and more.
4. I am losing weight--just one pound each week on average, which, at that rate means I will be at the weight I desire by Valentine's Day 2009. But I'm good with that.
So there you go. Ways to recognize that I feel better. I am so relieved to find that all of the talk I've heard and all of the articles I've read are true--the voices who say that medications can help restore normalcy for somebody who is for real depressed and anxious are true.
And now, that thing I took for granted is back--I can get up and live my life.
And feel better.
ps I totally stole this picture from my daughter's friend's website. It's Breanne and her buddy, Spencer. Best friends.
1 comment:
what an excellent and heartening report. so glad to hear it. i hope some of your excellent energy and positive thoughts rub off on the jazz. who can use all of that they can get, just like the rest of us.
xo
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