so many directions to go

life here in the gardens has been swirly lately. so many thoughts, so many large and small events, so many emotions. i can't decide where to start and decided instead to do what i always do when feeling swirly--make a list. a mind-clearing, slow-down-the-swirly list.

1. what would we do at work without fellow workers who screw up and need legal help?
2. i still have two loads of wash to complete.
3. time to get out in the gardens and do some taming of the jungle.
4. what shall i do about dolly and her incontinence?
5. what would dolly do about me if i were incontinent?
6. only 4 days to 1/2 a century.
7. i am so wise.
8. i am so ditzy.
9. where did i lose all of those thoughts?
10. where did i gain all of this weight?
11. wonder if jack will buy us both bikes for my birthday like i told him to?
12. i really like the powder blue one that's just like my friend, lisab's bike.
13. did i wish my mom hadn't given jessie a hard time for putting coconut on the german chocolate bars?
14. could i have laughed any harder when jack said he was cuckoo for coconut and we'd better all watch out because he's a big guy and jessie's house is an adorable little house that might not be able to hold all of his cuckooness?
15. need to go put away the year's supply of certain foods from costco.
16. need to have another glass of that chocolate milk from costco.
17. what a great time we had, sugar, colleen, and me, on saturday--yardsailing, laughing, talking, squishing each other in colleen's little tiny truck, eating at del taco--a first for me--seeing all the progress colleen has made on her seriously fixer-upper house.
18. wonder if i should have bought that 22 caliber rifle barrel for $10 since colleen didn't want it.
19. why did i think that 22 caliber rifle barrel for $10 was so funny?
20. when i read amelia's blog, i think she must live in an amazing, wonderful world--not just because it's scotland, but seriously, who gets to see puffins live and in person with the adorable evie and miriam?
21. how amazing was it that when audrey showed up at breanne's house last night and i asked breanne if she would let audrey play with some of her toys, she said yes, and i didn't hear MINE even one time.
22. what about those great, brand-new dresses i got at a yard sail for just $4 each. not to mention the fisherprice house that will entertain audrey for many visits to come.
23. does janey look like her mom or what?
24. how satisfying is it that everybody can call out to janey to get her to smile for a picture and i quietly call her name and she turns and looks across the room at me and smiles for the picture and then squeals immediately after.
25. is that teensy tiny anti-anxiety pill simply a jackpot bonus when it's visit the family time or what?
26. how long will it take for all of the little slivers in my hands (from weeding yesterday morning) to stop hurting whenever i see them or think of them or touch them.
27. did i mention the bikes?
28. how happy am i that i got the bathroom clean on saturday?
29. wow, about time i unloaded the suitcase from our trip to indiana.
30. michael phelps.
31. jr's so glad when herschel comes home; glad as he can be;
32. herschel almost had to chase jr around the yard to give him a hug and cheer him up last night.
33. it's almost payday again.
34. not so sure about the beach volleyball. girls in bikinis jumping in sand? hm.
35. i may have to become a fan of kyle busch since he seems so much like the young #3 driver.
36. still need to pick up bagels, bananas, bam, and yogurt--the b things at albertsons, the y thing at smiths.
37. i am so very lucky to have great girlfriends.
38. yardsailing caused me to miss out on the cement pouring at stu's. shucks.
39. did i mention that the opwo and i share a birthday but of course she is five years younger than me.
40. did i mention that i am 40 years wiser than the opwo?
41. it's decided-i am going to stick the little hula dancer i picked up yard sailing on the dash in my scion.
42. i'm over and done with using 'should'.
43. i cut back the neighbor's grapevine that was growing all over my rose of sharon and attaching itself so tightly that i had to use my BIG lopers and i feel no guilt.
44. it is so good to see friends.
45. i just saw my film class teacher in a zions bank commercial.
46. gotta check out the film class website and see if my film is still there. or was ever there. or if there's a film class website yet.
47. i'm 40 years kinder too.
48. it sounds like miss abbey is totally growing into herself.
49. i'm much calmer now.

you probably thought i was headed all of the way to fifty, but i'm not going there until i have to. and that will be early early on saturday morning when my phone rings and my mom sings 'happy birthday' to me. and i will smile because she thinks it is exactly the thing that everybody she know wants for their birthday.